Useful Work Tips

Here are some incredibly useful phrases you can use when in the workplace...

If you don't know what it is, call it an 'issue'…
If you don't know how it works, call it a 'process'…
If you don't know whether its worth doing, call it an 'option'…
If you don't know how it could possibly be done call it a 'challenge' or an 'exciting opportunity'…
If you want to confuse people, ask them about 'customers'…
If you don't know how to do something, 'empower' someone else to do it for you…
If you can't take decisions, 'create space' for others to operate…
If you need a decision, call a 'workshop' to 'network' and 'ground
the issue', followed by an 'awayday' to 'position the elephant in the room' and achieve 'buy-in'…
Never criticize or boast, call it 'information sharing'…
Never call something a failure or mistake, its a 'positive learning experience'…
Never argue, have an 'adult conversation'…
Here are some helpful ways to get along at the workplace...
If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights…
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt…
Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted…
It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done and what you're going to do…
After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before…
The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get…
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and wear a lab coat…
Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day…
When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves…
If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it…
There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from the office…
Keep your boss's boss off your boss's back…
Everything can be filed under "pending."…
Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a cocktail hour…
To err is human, to forgive is not our policy…
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he/she is supposed to be doing…
Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail…
If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it…
You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk…
People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn't…
If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done…
At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying…
When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried…
Following the rules will not get the job done…
Getting the job done is no excuse for not following the rules…
When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"…
No matter how much you do, you never do enough…
The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong…

Kitchen Cleaning Tips

Another bunch of tips I snagged from a friend and sharing

Enjoy :)

"Kitchen Cleaning" 

  
Instead of using commercial waxes, shine appliances by using rubbing alcohol.
To whiten appliances that have begun to yellow, apply a mixture of 1/2 cup bleach, 1/4 cup baking soda and 4 cups warm water. Let set for 10 minutes before rinsing and drying.
Clean stainless steel burner pans on stoves by putting them in a large pan, adding enough water to cover, and 3/4 to 1 cup baking soda. Simmer on low for about 1 hour, then wash with regular detergent. Any stains that remain can be removed by ribbing lightly with a steel wool soap pad.
Run greasy stove hood filters through the dishwasher.

Blender

To clean the blender, fill part way with hot water and add a drop of detergent. Cover and turn it on for a few seconds. Rinse and drain dry.

Broiler

To clean the broiler pan, sprinkle the hot pan heavily with dry laundry detergent. Cover with a dampened paper towel and let the burned food set for a while. The pan should require little scouring.
When broiling, put a cup of water in the bottom of the broiler pan before starting. Cleanup is easier, and the drippings create instant gravy. This also eliminates smoke.

Butcher Block

Minimize stains and cover scratches by rubbing mineral oil on surfaces. Mineral oil is odor-free and nontoxic.

Can Opener

Loosen grime from a can opener by brushing with an old toothbrush. To thoroughly clean blades, run a paper towel through the cutting process.

Cast Iron

To clean cast iron skillets, clean the OUTSIDE of the pan with commercial oven cleaner. Let set for 2 hours and the black stains can be removed with vinegar and water. After cleaning pan, take a piece of wax paper and, while skillet is still warm, wipe around the inside to prevent rusting. Or, when clean, rub a small amount of oil  on the inside of the pan to keep it seasoned.
To remove charred food and burn spots from cast iron skillets, boil vinegar and salt in the skillet.
Put a coffee filter into cast iron skillets when you put them away. The filter absorbs moisture and prevents rusting.

China

To remove coffee or tea stains and cigarette burns from fine China, rub with a damp cloth dipped in baking soda.

Coffee Pot

Perk one tablespoon powder dishwashing detergent and a full pot of water through the coffeemaker to get it clean without any scrubbing.
Remove stains from a glass pot by rubbing them with a lemon slice.

Copper

Remove tarnish from cooper cookware by mixing equal parts of salad and vinegar or salt and lemon juice. Rub it into the tarnished area with a paper towel. Restore the copper's shine by scrubbing it with a wet steel wool soap pad. (Avoid abrasives on soft tin linings.)
Wipe tarnished cooper with undiluted tomato juice applied with a soft, clean cloth and your pot bottoms and candlesticks will shine! Make sure that you rinse thoroughly.

Crystal

Vinegar is a must when washing crystal. Rinse in 1 part vinegar to 3 parts warm water. Air dry. Crystal will be spotless!

Cutting Board

To rid cutting board of onion, garlic or fish smell, cut a lime or lemon in two and rub the surface with the cut side of the fruit.
Pour liquid bleach on the cutting board to clean and sanitize it. Rinse well, then apply a bit of mineral oil.
Pour liquid bleach on the cutting board to clean and sanitize it. Rinse well, then apply a bit of mineral oil.
To make a stained cutting board look like new, mix a couple teaspoons of liquid bleach into a dishpan full of warm water. Scrub the board. Rinse the board several times with very hot water.

Deodorizer

Boil a little vinegar or a teaspoon of cloves in a half-cup water to dispel cooking odors.

Detergent

Always use the cheapest brand of dishwashing detergent available, but add a few tablespoons of vinegar to the dishwater. The vinegar will cut the grease and leave your dishes sparkling clean.

Dishes

To quickly remove food that is stuck to a casserole dish, fill it with boiling water and add 2 tablespoons of baking soda or salt.
Use the cheapest brand of dishwashing detergent available. Add a few tablespoons of vinegar to the dishwater. The vinegar cuts and grease and leaves dishes sparkling clean.

Dishwasher

To clean, use regular powdered laundry bleach instead of dishwasher detergent in an empty machine. It cleans and disinfects.
Before loading the silverware tray, place a sponge in the bottom. It will prevent small utensils from falling to the bottom.
To remove stains from the inside of the dishwasher, set a cup of bleach in the bottom of the dishwasher and run it through the entire cycle. Then run a cup of vinegar through an entire cycle. DO NOT mix the bleach and vinegar as it will cause poisonous gases in the dishwasher.
When removing dishes from the dishwasher, unload the bottom rack first so that water that has pooled in glasses or cups on the top rack doesn't drip onto the dishes below.

Disposal

Grind a half lemon or orange rind in the disposal to remove any unpleasant odor.
Deodorize it by running lemon, orange or grapefruit peel through it.

Food Grinder

After using a food grinder, get all the ground material out and make the grinder much easier to clean by running a slice of bread through it before dismantling.

Formica

Scrape dried food spills off counters with a square plastic tab such as that found on bread bags. It won't scratch as a metal utensil might.
Polish Formica tops to a sparkle with club soda.

Freezer

A piece of charcoal in your freezer will keep it smelling sweet.
To clean a frost-free freezer, mix 1/2 cup of isopropyl alcohol with a dishpan full of lukewarm water. The alcohol loosens any icy matter. Sponge away the dirt. The alcohol evaporates rapidly, so you do not have to dry.

After defrosting the freezer, spray it with alcohol or vegetable oil spray. It will be less work the next time you defrost.

Great tips for a lot of aches & pains

Keep this on the Fridge

Did You Know That? Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately -- without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional "pain relievers."

Did you know that Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns.

Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong Altoids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.

Achy muscles from a bout of the flu? Mix 1 Tablespoon of horseradish in 1 cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a massage oil, for instant relief for aching muscles.

Sore throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and take 1 tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.

Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer . Just dissolve two tablets in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms. Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly -- even though the product was never been advertised for this use. ( Note : Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine is not the same..and contains aspirin, which can cause stomach bleeding if you have ulcers.)

Honey remedy for skin blemishes ... Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight.

Listerine therapy for toenail fungus ... Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.

Easy eyeglass protection ... To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.

Coca-Cola cure for rust ... Forget those expensive rust removers. Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain. The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.

Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer ... If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409 . Insects drop to the ground instantly.

Smart splinter remover ...just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue-All over the splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin. The splinter sticks to the dried glue.

Hunt's tomato paste boil cure ....cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.

Balm for broken blisters ...To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine ... a powerful antiseptic.

Heinz vinegar to heal bruises ... Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for 1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.

Kills fleas instantly. Dawn dish washing liquid does the trick. Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly. Rinse well to avoid skin irritations Goodbye fleas. 

Rainy day cure for dog odor... Next time your dog comes in from the rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet, instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh.

Eliminate ear mites ... All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in your cat's ear. Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball. Repeat daily for 3 days. The oil soothes the cat's skin, smothers the mites, and accelerates healing.

Quaker Oats for fast pain relief ....It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix 2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.

Surprising Expiration Dates

A handy, who-knew guide for 77 foods, beauty products, and household goods.

Certain items in your house practically scream "toss me" when their prime has passed. That
Mysterious extra white layer on the Cheddar? A sure sign it needs to be put out of its misery.
Chunky milk? Down the drain it goes.

But what about that jar of olives or Maraschino cherries that has resided in
Your refrigerator since before the birth of your kindergartner? Or the
Innumerable nonedibles lurking deep within your cabinets and closets:
Stockpiled shampoo and toothpaste, seldom-used silver polish?
How do you know when their primes have passed?

With help from experts and product manufacturers, Real Simple
( Real Simple: Life made easier) has compiled a guide to expiration dates.
These dates are offered as a rough guideline. The shelf lives of most products depend upon how you treat them. Edibles, unless otherwise indicated, should be stored in a cool, dry place. (With any food, of course, use common sense.)

Household cleaners also do best in a dry place with a stable temperature. After the dates shown, beauty and cleaning products are probably still safe but may be less effective.

Food

Beer
Unopened: 4 months.

Brown sugar
Indefinite shelf life, stored in a moistureproof container in a cool, dry place.

Chocolate (Hershey bar)
1 year from production date

Coffee, canned ground
Unopened: 2 years
Opened: 1 month refrigerated

Coffee, gourmet
Beans: 3 weeks in paper bag, longer in vacuum-seal bag (After this time, color
Or flavor may be affected, but product is still generally safe to consume.)
Ground: 1 week in sealed container

Coffee, instant
Unopened: Up to 2 years
Opened: Up to 1 month

Diet soda (and soft drinks in plastic bottles)
Unopened: 3 months from "best by" date.
Opened: Doesn't spoil, but taste is affected.

Dried pasta
12 months

Frozen dinners
Unopened: 12 to 18 months

Frozen vegetables
Unopened: 18 to 24 months
Opened: 1 month

Honey
Indefinite shelf life

Juice, bottled (apple or cranberry)
Unopened: 8 months from production date
Opened: 7 to 10 days

Ketchup
Unopened: 1 year (After this time, color or flavor may be affected, but product is
Still generally safe to consume.)
Opened or used: 4 to 6 months (After this time, color or flavor may be affected,
But product is still generally safe to consume.)

Maple syrup, real or imitation
1 year

Maraschino cherries
Unopened: 3 to 4 years
Opened: 2 weeks at room temperature; 6 months refrigerated

Marshmallows
Unopened: 40 weeks
Opened: 3 months

Mayonnaise
Unopened: Indefinitely
Opened: 2 to 3 months from "purchase by" date (After this time, color or flavor
May be affected, but product is still generally safe to consume.)

Mustard
2 years (After this time, color or flavor may be affected, but product is still
Generally safe to consume.)

Olives, jarred (green with pimento)
Unopened: 3 years
Opened: 3 months

Olive oil
2 years from manufacture date (After this time, color or flavor may be affected,
But product is still generally safe to consume.)

Peanuts
Unopened: 1 to 2 years unless frozen or refrigerated
Opened: 1 to 2 weeks in airtight container

Peanut butter, natural
9 months

Peanut butter, processed (Jif)
Unopened: 2 years
Opened: 6 months; refrigerate after 3 months

Pickles
Unopened: 18 months
Opened: No conclusive data. Discard if slippery or excessively soft.

Protein bars (PowerBars)
Unopened: 10 to 12 months. Check "best by" date on the package.

Rice, white
2 years from date on box or date of purchase

Salad dressing, bottled
Unopened: 12 months after "best by" date
Opened: 9 months refrigerated

Soda, regular
Unopened: In cans or glass bottles, 9 months from "best by" date
Opened: Doesn't spoil, but taste is affected

Steak sauce
33 months (After this time, color or flavor may be affected, but product is
Still generally safe to consume.)

Tabasco
5 years, stored in a cool, dry place

Tea bags (Lipton)
Use within 2 years of opening the package

Tuna, canned
Unopened: 1 year from purchase date
Opened: 3 to 4 days, not stored in can

Soy sauce, bottled
Unopened: 2 years
Opened: 3 months (After this time, color or flavor may be affected, but product
is still generally safe to consume.)

Vinegar
42 months

Wine (red, white)
Unopened: 3 years from vintage date; 20 to 100 years for fine wines
Opened: 1 week refrigerated and corked

Worcestershire sauce
Unopened: 5 to 10 years (After this time, color or flavor may be affected, but
product is still generally safe to consume.)
Opened: 2 years

Household Products

Air freshener, aerosol
2 years

Antifreeze, premixed
1 to 5 years

Antifreeze, concentrate
Indefinite

Batteries, alkaline
7 years

Batteries, lithium
10 years

Bleach
3 to 6 months

Dish detergent, liquid or powdered
1 year

Fire extinguisher, rechargeable
Service or replace every 6 years

Fire extinguisher, nonrechargeable
12 years

Laundry detergent, liquid or powdered
Unopened: 9 months to 1 year
Opened: 6 months

Metal polish (silver, copper, brass)
At least 3 years

Miracle Gro, liquid
Opened: 3 to 8 years

Miracle Gro, liquid, water-soluble
Indefinite

Motor oil
Unopened: 2 to 5 years
Opened: 3 months

Mr. Clean
2 years

Paint
Unopened: Up to 10 years
Opened: 2 to 5 years

Spray paint
2 to 3 years

Windex
2 years

Wood polish (Pledge)
2 years

Beauty Products

All dates are from the manufacture date, which is either displayed on the
packaging or can be obtained by calling the manufacturer's customer-service
number.

Bar soap
18 months to 3 years

Bath gel, body wash
3 years

Bath oil
1 year

Body bleaches and depilatories
Unopened: 2 years
Used: 6 months

Body lotion
3 years

Conditioner
2 to 3 years

Deodorant
Unopened: 2 years
Used: 1 to 2 years
For antiperspirants, see expiration date

Eye cream
Unopened: 3 years
Used: 1 year

Face lotion
With SPF, see expiration date. All others, at least 3 years

Foundation, oil-based
2 years

Foundation, water-based
3 years

Hair gel
2 to 3 years

Hair spray
2 to 3 years

Lip balm
Unopened: 5 years
Used: 1 to 5 years

Lipstick
2 years

Mascara
Unopened: 2 years
Used: 3 to 4 months

Mouthwash
Three years from manufacture date

Nail polish
1 year

Nail-polish remover
Lasts indefinitely

Perfume
1 to 2 years

Rubbing alcohol
At least 3 years

Shampoo
2 to 3 years

Shaving cream
2 years or more

Tooth-whitening strips
13 months

Wash'n Dri moist wipes
Unopened: 2 years
Opened: Good until dried out